shine on you crazy diamond...

Life is a paradox. You won't find anyone who thinks more about what other people think than yours truly, the sarcastic bitcher. Mom has been telling me all my life not to care, while modeling not caring about others at all, which backfired in that Butterbaby cares more than necessary. Dr. S. continues in this fine tradition, but I will always compare myself to better moms, skinnier/prettier girls, more accomplished writers, faster thinkers, more kittenish kittens. You know who you are my delicious friends. But for the most part, 99 percent part, I leave my friends out of these comparison studies. I, important me, compare myself to perfect strangers. Not perfect as in perfect 10s. There aren't that many to begin with, mostly 7s and 5s, but perfect as in I don't feckin know them and why the f do I care what they think of my fat ass or why I’m crying behind my sunglasses on a sunny day or why I wear strappy heels with sweats. People are a judgmental lot though, so maybe that's why I worry. I mean, I'm given the road rage finger a lot. That should tell you something. But hey, at least I’m being noticed. Even if it's just my senior citizen driving style when M's in the back. Oh, ramble on, you crazy diamond. Thanks, Pink Floyd, for giving me the freedom not to make sense. Yummy Syd.

I Want My "Hm, Like, Duh" TV

I'm so glad I grew up with MTV and music videos. Kids these days think it's all about the "Situation," Snooki and her Pouf. I actually was fortunate to see Joan Jett and Depeche Mode and Prince and ZZ Top and Motley Cru and all the horrible-wonderful 80s bands. Today, MTV announced it dropped the Music Television" from its logo. The era has been dead for a long time, but this is the final nail in the coffin. Sorry, couldn't resist all the clichés.

Gag Reflex - Withheld

I'm a hypocrite. When the cute drummer sweetly said I still look sexy, even fat, and that he played on the album of Pete Yorn (who, by the way, was not kicked out of Footsies; that was yours truly) and Scarlett Jo., I didn't say: Really? Gag me with a spoon! I said: Oh, wow, that's cool.

Res Ipsa Loquitur

I., who is Russian and from Great Britain, was very excited today when he told me that he discovered a cool radio station here. I knew right away which one he meant. Duh. Indie 103.1. At that point neither one of us knew of the terrible fact that today was Indie's last day on the airwaves. They didn't make it because they played too much good music, stuff like Gang of Four, Sonic Youth, Belle and Sebastian, all kinds of punk and new wave and true indie music like Amazing Baby and Darker My Love. But there are too many motherfuckers out there who prefer Beyonce and Kanye and Britney. 'Tis a sad day in American history. Another nail in the fucking coffin. Even an urban sprawl like LA is populated by idiots with horrible taste. I find it hard to believe that there are so few of us that we cannot even keep an alternative radio station alive.